So here?s how this medical miracle works - apparently, ?Optic Arthritis? happens when your backdoor wiring crosses paths with your eyeball circuits.

In other words, your ass and your eyesight become best friends.

Next thing you know, everything you see looks like shit - because, congratulations, you?re literally seeing through your asshole.

You start waking up cranky, walking around like life?s out to get you, blaming everyone else, while your own brain?s fogged up with fumes from the factory down south.

???

And don?t even try to argue - I?ve met folks so far gone with this condition, they could fart and cry at the same time.

Pure talent.

So if you or someone you know?s sufferin? from this tragic butt-to-brain crossover? please? for the love of Charmin, call the hotline:

1-800-ASS-HOLE

Operators are standin? by - pickin? their asses, blinkin? through the tears, and waitin? for your call.

?????????????...and that's callin' it like it is!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Canadian artist & digital troublemaker Colin John Cook shares his louder-than-life, awkward, and honest-as-hell stories. Packed with humour, real talk & creative insights in a no filter, digital comedy space that laughs at life & calls it like it is. He is also the Founder and President of

The Hidden Gallery - Art Studio & Micro Theatre

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